Turning over a new leaf…..hopefully

I’m going to go off of my usual topics for this post. There have been some events in my life lately that I think I need to share. Listen up. This could actually apply to you.

So it’s April and a bunch of people at my school are getting asked to prom and ordering tickets. It kind of makes me sad because I didn’t get asked and no one is going to ask me. That seems like a pretty Debby Downer thing to say, but it’s true. The prom at my school is a senior prom so only seniors can invite dates. I would have to get asked by a senior guy to be able to go and frankly, I don’t really know any senior guys. My chances are none existent. I did go to prom last year though so I can’t be that bitter for not being able to go this year. It’s just all these people getting asked makes me really pray to Jesus that I get to go to my prom with that one special someone. I don’t want to go stag and you can trust me when I say that there is no way I’m going to prom dateless. I refuse to go dateless which means I have to have a date. Having a date means that I know a guy well enough for them to ask me or me to ask them. This means I need to step up my game. As of right now I have no guys in my life that I could consider asking. This is a problem and it is manly caused by me. I’m shy. I don’t really talk much in class. The thing is, I’m really not a quiet person. I love to joke around with my family and friends. I do it all the time. The cat comes and grabs my tongue when I’m around people I don’t know as well. I don’t understand why I’m like this. Personally, it’s frustrating. I know what you are thinking. “Why doesn’t she just talk to people? Talking to people is natural. It’s an everyday thing.” You are absolutely right but it’s easier said than done.

The guys that I want to talk to are usually in the “popular” group of kids at school. I am not “popular.” This is again most likely attributed to the fact that I don’t talk as much as I probably should. Since these guys aren’t in my circle of friends, I don’t ever see them outside of class. They never see what I’m really like. Another reason they never see what I’m really like is the fact that I never end up sitting by them in class. Since I don’t sit next to them it makes it very difficult to talk to them. Plus, they always seem to be near all of their friends and always talking to them. It always seems like I have bad luck with this kind of thing but then I realize that I actually have to do something about it. I can’t just sit there and wonder what would happen if I talked to someone. I have to make it happen and find out for myself.

There’s this guy that I’ve had a crush on for like three years now. It’s been off and on but I always seem to go back to him one way or another. It’s been that long and here I am having said minimal words to him. I know. It’s pathetic. I realize that. I definitely have some work to do. I need to break out of my shell. I need to show people what I’m really about. Chances are someone worth while will notice and take action. Chances are that person will the one I’ve been waiting for. Who know? All I know is that I have got to change. Changing is the only way that I will be getting a date for prom next year because what I have going for me right now is clearly not working. There’s not a guy in sight. Wish me luck! I’m going to need it.

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