Dear Marc Jacobs,
I like you as a designer. I really do. You think outside the box and create some really desirable clothing that I would love to own, but are unfortunately, out of my price range. Maybe someday in the future, when I actually have money, I will be able to own some of your masterpieces. Well, there’s something that I need to tell you and I’ve kind of been trying to soften the blow with my compliments, but this needs to be said. Your fall collection is whack. Sorry, but not sorry. It’s just gross. I mean, who would wear that?!? Hopefully no one, because those clothes are not ok. First of all, the patterns and colors are not attractive. They look like an old couch. I don’t know about you, but I do not want to look like a couch. The shape of your skirts make a person look like they are wearing a cardboard box with grandma’s old dusty coach wrapped around it. Four words. NOT EVEN REMOTELY ATTRACTIVE (to put it nicely). The hats are just weird. They are way too big and poofy. If you wore those things, no one would be able to tell if you had a head or if you were even human! One of the outfits, (as seem below) looks like the girl just got out of her bed in Wonderland. NO. NO. NO! These clothes make people look like they just escaped from the loony bin or need to be locked up in the loony bin. Loony bin = crazy people = not where sane people live. I don’t know if I get your esthetic, but to me it’s something like Homeless Psychopath. I’m pretty sure that no one on the planet aspires to be homeless and/or a psychopath, so why are you making people look like them? I don’t know either Marc. Maybe you yourself has gone crazy. I have no clue, but I will say this. Please, please, please, make your next collection for humans and not aliens. Thank you.
With criticism and love,
None of Your Business
Photos curtesy of marcjacobs.com